You Like Her Better

Luke 11-32

Studying this text in various groups this week has allowed me to glimpse a shared theme of family expectations. Family is so hard and so vital! One of the main cornerstones of my faith is koinonia - relationship. The tangled web of interrelatedness among friends and family and our connectedness to God. And, isn't that what we are all about as Christians anyway?

The complex way we influence each other in biological families is just the tip of the iceberg as we extend that to our church families and the dynamics within the church. How do we relate, interact, love and worship together?

Teaching confirmation last night, one of the youth asked for clarification on grace and what it means. Struggling with that with her and then continuing on my own meditations has led to some insight on family. I explained to her that an easy illustration comes to us from Romans 6 - we can't be sin free. But that does not give us carte blanche to go about lives like we want relying on Jesus forgiveness and not trying to live following His example to the best of our ability.

Think of it like this I continued - Do you always behave in a way that your parents approve of? No. Do your parents get angry with you and sometimes not like you very much? Yes. But do they ALWAYS love you? Yes. (I'm sorry for groups where that is not true of all parents, but I knew it held with these particular kids) That is something like grace. Grace is the gift we receive through Jesus Christ - an invitation into the love of being in relationship and in the Christian family.

In Luke's story of the prodigal son, the story is similar. The younger son is surprisingly welcomed back with feasting. The son who remained and 'did what he was supposed to' is disgruntled and doesn't understand. Our God is a mysterious yet gracious God. It is not for us to decide who deserves the love of family, nor is it for us to try to earn that grace.

It's easy to put myself in the shoes of the sibling doing what I was supposed to - I am big on following rules. But, being human, I have fallen short. Iamgine yourself in the shoes of the prodigal son. How was I received in family and friends when this happened? I don't know about your experience, but when I was welcomed back or forgiven, it was almost harder than facing expected consquences. We have trouble with gifts.

How many times has someone asked if you needed help and you said no when the answer was really - YES! Most of us get tied up in our pride and don't take money handouts or help. We are taught that we should earn things. We should be independent and not burden others. Even in our Christian family, we prefer to be the giver than the recipient. Think on the words of the scripture today - the prodigal didn't come back for a handout. He came back because he thought that his father's servants had it better than where he was serving. He completely abased himself and expected to be a servant instead of welcomed in as a son.

That grace thing - even though we know we should expect it, we grapple with the concept of something competely undeserved, unearned. We want to rank, justify and prioritize. American society certainly teaches that we should be like the older son in this story. And, Jesus does not turn this son away. The father tells the older son that everything I own is yours. He pleads with the older son to come back inside. That nigling feeling in the back of our mind that gets out the scales and measures what we are worth,and what others are worth, and worse that assesses what we are worth by looking at others - this feeling need to be set aside.

The parable is not saying one son is better than the other or more deserving. But, I can't think of even one family where I at least one if not all of the siblings have said/thought the famous - 'but you love her/him better' when measuring how they rank up in family. The grace of the Father is offered to all His children. We are not in a position to judge and rank. God is the great flattener -the equalizer who give us an undeniable gift. When even the least one goes astray, they are welcomed back. Grace is favor, kindness, love extended to all. God's saving grace is extended to all through the faith of Jesus Christ. There is abundance and plenty.